odd ones in Bergen and the bus

Bergen is a small cozy town with a colorful history, fascinating people and odd architecture. One day I was taking the bus, a man wobbled out of the ride, wearing a big winter jacket, with a huge hood. Where his phone was, which blasted rap at full volume, as he brandished a butterfly knife and a can of beer. He was quite drunk and rowdy to say the least. Knocking at the bus side with his knife, before he angry shambles away like a zombie.

Another oddball was a two meter tall man, a fellow with a unkempt beard, stained yellow with tobacco. He quietly shuffled through the town in his signature blue trench coat, smelling like piss and vinegar. He had a habit of sitting at various bus stops, asking for coin, with a stern voice. He usually spent money on ice cream or more tobacco. When he eventually passed away, there was a big news article about him.

The fact that Bergen has an institution for people with various mental issues and a selection of annoying drug addicts, combined with the relatively small size makes spotting then easy and encountering then just as easily.

Norway is also a very religious land, with a lot of Christians, some more devoted that other. I've seen several scarfed women caring big signs, while preaching abut Jenova or somesuch, the alleged name of god.

For the most part they squat in various parks, l like a collection of dried out corpses, devoid of life, lacking that spark of life. Mostly harmless though, even if they participate in a lot of petty thefts, especially bicycles gets stolen frequently.


Commuting is usually a simple process, unless you live far outside town, then you've got less alternatives and at lest an hour, if not more travel time. While we have a lot of regular buses, some of them will eventually break down at stupid moments, or develop odd quirks. The same holds true for the drivers. The other day I got a very impromptu call from a potential business partner in town. I do dislike on the same day appointments, anyhow the most remarkable thing happened during the ride. The bus started to wail like a bloody whale, flooding the airways with an ear piercing shriek, a series of high pitched noise vibrated through ventilation grid in the roof.


Another bus had water stuck between the double glass, which made for a fascinating effect as it sloshed back and forth along with the acceleration of the bus.

The most notable driver I've ever seen was an elderly man, whos head was spasming all over the plass while driving. He had a steady hand, but his head not so much. Which made everything a tad bit disturbing.

Bad for business bakery

Being a baker has some benefits, but I'm not one so that point is a bit moot. At highschool I went to a course revolving around waiters and cooks. It was an interesting and uplifting experience. But entity l sure why I thought it was a good idea. Probably because someone said that chicks love a good chef. That year was an interesting one, a bit of a train wreck to be honest. I'm truly bad at obsessive studying and performing well at tests. There are two things I really recall quite clearly. One was the very repugnant and pudgy science teacher. She strutted around in a smelly t-shirt, whilst talking in a high pitched voice. She knew her stuff and did her best I suppose. But her body odour and breath was bad. Imagine the smell of compost, mixed with coffee and smelly sweaty arm pits. Mind you this is bad enough, but imagine having her in close proximity as she is helping you with the course work.

As bad as she was, there was this bakery I was to work at for a week to get some practical experience. Next to Puddefjord bridge in Bergen there is a tall, tall industrial office block. A building where many companies resides, among them a bakery near the top floor. For the most part the company made confectionery and sub baguettes. The place had problems and I did something really stupid. Not that stupid, but my delivery could be better though.

The place was anything but pristine. Various baking machine was placed across the floor, with a reception desk by the entrance. The wall opposite of the one with the windows had several long shelves, containing various ingredients and several construction tools in between. Yes this place had seen better days. In the middle of the shelves was a wardrobe with a humongous stack of empty bottles. Every inch was coated in a thin layer of flour. A fine white powder, which also extended to the rest of the location as well. I could practically skid across the floor. In order to store and move great quantities of baked goods about, several practically ancient wheeled shelves where used. Each one was brown by rust and made a horrid screeching sound as the personnel struggled to push it across the floor. The sounds emitted is up there with nails on a blackboard. Several of the floor titles were broken as well, however it was especially bad next to the cargo elevator. Where a crummy old sink was attached to the wall. The floor tiles where practically strained black by an unknown substance and damage which had built up over time. From what I could guess it was a mix of water damage and possible dirt. The various mixing machines had old pieces of dough attached to various rolling pins. The whole place stood out to me as a mockery of good hygiene practices. Would it hurt them to scrape and wash the machinery? Clean up the flour dust? Its only a fire hazzard and I'm sure people love old pieces of dough in their buns.

The stupid thing I did was to write a report, which I left out in the open. Which a disgruntled employee decided to read. But as we all know, humans hate criticism, especially from the new guy.
This is unacceptable he said as he threw my carefully penned paper into the rubbish bin. I got fired on the third day and my teacher was anything but pleased. Maybe I should have waited a couple of days before dropping the bomb, never the less, there was practically no consequences for me. Not a bad outcome I'd say, since it makes for a slightly interesting story.

Zaceron

Monkey King Cosplay WIP

Warriors Orochi is an interesting odd ball of a game, its a crossover between Dynasty Warriors and Samurai Warriors. Two very distinctive series with the same mash buttons and hordes goes flying, with a colorful cast of character from history. 

The monkey king is a very well known character from Chinese mythology. An insanely strong monkey man with an extendable cudgel he usually hide in his ear. He shows up in several moba games, such as Dota2, League of Legends, smite and many, many more. The character also shows up in various anime series and stories across the world or derivatives. Despite how well known and loved Wukong is. A great deal of the cosplay community has very little knowledge of him. Then again a lot of cosplayers have very little knowledge of series outside the ones they know of and will be very, very biased. Then gain so am I. My idea for a cosplay this time around is the Sun Wukong, the Monkey king, the one Goku is based on. In fact the basis for  Dragonballs story is based on a Journey to the West. Ironically a whole series about the legend of Monkey was released on Netflix, the day before the competition.

Despite this most people I know is willfully ignorant of this wonderful and whimsy story revolving around the character. Yet another obscure cosplay I have a brilliant plan behind, where the choices I make will be unknown to most people. Aside from this very blog. last weekend there was a lan known as Hordalan, where they held a cosplay and an outfit competition. Where I promptly lost to a woman with two lit lighters and a waving Disney princess. My dignity hurts badly, so to make up for this I will use my spite to make an even more awesome display, worthy of Wukongs legend. In the end he is a wushu monkey and I'm a wushu practitioner. Otherwise known as Kungfu, often associated with Hong Kong cinema and Bruce Lee. After all I am a professional, which means I have to make a better costume that I will use more than a day to complete. Whilst practicing monkey staff wushu. The art of acting like a monkey, climbing the staff and beating the living snot out of people. Hopefully it will not lead to such monkey business.

Anyhow the idea is to combine my skills at making professional looking and quality cosplay, while retaining movement and being comfortable in a hot location. Plus I can use it for wushu competitions and practice. I have a staff, a waistcoat and a not so magical headband. I'm more or less done with the arm guards, that only leaves the red part on the pants, painting and the leg bracers. 

On a side tangent, every one and their brother loves Worbla, that mythological thermoplastic that can be molded with heath. However it comes at a price, its expensive and usually requires a basic foundation to build on top of. The sheets of material acts a lot like dough, but to get to that point, it will become finger scorching hot. Which is why I found a glass of water very useful to have nearby. Especially when smoothing out some of the Worbla, since it's very warm.

Today I embarked on the first step of my cosplay. Recreating the red arm guards with black lining and gold decorations on. For those whom wants to make their own version, I have posted the schematics.Crafting an arm guards is a simple affair, especially this one since it only has a slight curve. The tricky part is the piece that goes above the knuckles. The 3D model only require two places to attach it and that's purely visual fluff. An actual set of these requires at least three and a joint strap as well. For this build to even work I have to attach straps from the knuckle guard to the underside of my palm. The pattern was traced onto cardboard, so I had a guide to use on the craft foam, which I eventually put a layer of Worbla on top. Like I mention earlier its a very simple build, with few tricky parts. The issue is simply comfort and accuracy. 

As usual I live stream the process and do a token effort to make a youtube video.

https://www.twitch.tv/zaceron

Here is the the clip from the 5 minutes long competition. 

Enjoy, Zaceron out.

#warriorsOrochi #wukong #monkeyking #mydignity #zaceron #sandcos #lol #dota #smite #cosplay #monkeyBusiness 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-eN-B81_fk&feature=youtu.be

Beijing on a Bicycle part 2

The summer palace was another interesting journey I went on while riding a bike in a random direction for fun. Because that is a thing I just do, explore, take pictures and have a great time. There are two places to visit when going there, first is a red leisure building. With a big open lot right after the gate, where my bike was totally out of place but had the whole are to itself. Further inside the lot I came to a red temple like building with a lovely koi carp pound with hanging weeping willows touching the surface. In front of the pool they serve tea, at a very steep price. I dare say its the most expensive cup of chamomile tea I have ever had in my life. It tasted okay, but in the end it was a regular cup of tea with refill. The establishment also allowed tourist to pay to pay for carp food, to feed the inhabitants of the pool with. At one point or another a family dropped by and the kids got a bit rowdy with the fishes it seemed and the mother somehow caught one with her hand when the staff was distracted. 

The fish died, though and she just quietly slipped it back into the water belly up. Unfortunately they did not like the idea of taking pictures inside the leisure hall so I have none of that. From what I can gather it was intended as a tea and scenery location, where the lord could paint or write poetry. I did not inquire too deeply into the purpose of such a lavish building. Another notable construct nearby is the stone boat which probably don’t float. This one is a case of you can watch but not touch. Not that the gray worn out building gave the impression of safe place to be. Then again it seems like most traveling people in china does take a lot of stupid risks here and there. Such as the man regarding the stone fence. 

While cycling along rural roads I also encountered seemingly mundane and ultimately forgotten thing very few will ever notice. Such as the wild growing cucumber hanging from a branch, or a tiny cramped cart with poultry. At one point I even found a Venus from Milo knockoff sculpture in the middle of an overgrown intersection, next to a traffic mirror. I get the distinct impression that maintenance is not very high on the list and thing just happens here and there and no one cares. This is especially true with some of the broken houses I bypass. Where its obvious that people live, but the walls are missing and the fence is just stacked bricks.

Beijing on a bicycle part 1

Trough Beijing on a bicycle was a very unique experience indeed. Norway has fairly strict traffic laws regarding traffic and very expensive drivers license test. The ability to cause a traffic jam on a three line road is absolutely mind boggling . Then again the one next to the pavement work as a parking spot, bike lane and the place where dangerous bus drivers stop. First of all never get a bike with no gears, dirt cheap from a local dealer. Especially the one residing on the Beijing sports university campus. Not only are they worn, weather logged and crap. They are horrible at getting up slopes. Yet i brought the bugger all over the place, through most of Beijing, Probably why I screwed up my knee in the first place. Anyhow, further down the street there where several legit bike shops, with better products. As far as transportation goes, any kind of vehicle is recommended, el bikes is a popular pick. Most of the city is just a series of big squares with houses on them, big boring blocks, with little or no personality. The outskirts on the other hand got some really nice rural spots, ruins and various other  places to see.


One of the places I went by I got greeted by a guard dog, it was a nice dog doing its job. The most remarkable part of the lot was the giant fence, grid structure. Essentially the place looked like the owner was trying to recreate the thunder dome. Surrounding the lot was fencing composed of rusted metal plates, the type that goes onto roofs, topped by several meters of metal grids. I suppose its made of the metal scaffolding going inside concrete buildings. Amusing but I did not dare to overstay my welcome. Never mess with barking dogs and angry owners. By following the stone along the drainage canal, I also came across a overgrown grassy lot, littered with stone ornaments. Mostly those Chinese lucky lions, with the curly eyebrows resting their paw on a ball.

The path also took me to some sort of ornate temple, probably belonged to someone important at one point or another. The place itself was remarkable, there was a big pole with cloudy patterns on it reaching for the skies with a lion on top. Outside the place was also a big dried up and worn fountain. Next to the stairs was several of those concrete lions, the ones with bushy eyebrows, whom rest their paws on balls. The place was clearly being used by someone judging from the laundry hanging to dry outside, in between the two staircases. The car was also a telltale sign. However I still enjoyed the scenery and the novelty of the site. Further down the road was a bridge, where someone hid a bike and in all likely hood a mattress as well. Some people are poor and some just like to rest during the day. But staying next to the aqueduct during the evening I would not recommend. The mosquitoes are vicious big and very intrusive, I know this because they kept assaulting my at night, at the forth floor. Plus I tend to run into swarms of those when cycling forward and unlike a car I did not have a wind screen.


Despite the shallow water and the likely hood of pollution, some locals where actually fishing up fish from the river, I'm quite surprised that none of those had three eyes.

#beijing #journey #travel #zaceron #beijingpictures #china #bike #bicyclechina #

Something different

An absolutely fantastic day if I say so myself. It was a rough night getting over hunger induced headache. The trick is regular snacks and sleep. After watching some religious zealots getting thoroughly slammed with logic. I dragged myself from the bed and for dressed. Eventually I got to the bus stop, only to realize that I forgot the bag I was going to deliver. With only five minutes to go I ran like the wind back down the man murdering steep hill and up again. It's an interesting feeling to be gaping for air, while the spleen works overtime. The telltale sign of being in very bad shape. Half way to town, some shady fellows in thick coats entered the ride. One was dressed like a hacker, with a cap on his head. He plopped down into a a seat, taking a swig from a water bottle, before he started waking towards the back of the bus. It was a surprise ticke t control, good thing I had paid. The first goal was to deliver one half of the Mercy costume to my beautiful blonde apprentice, in the art of cosplay. After a solid hug, I went elsewhere to meet with a friend of mine known as Enok, a man that is a model, reality star and viking to the max. With long flowing hair and a long beard. He has that nordic air about him, always dressed like he's going somewhere, with a trusty dolk at his side. Together we have several plans in the making. Including a video series about Bergen, a bite sized Bergen. We got greeted by one of the true personalities of the town. A very loud and round man, sitting by a cafe enjoying coffee and smoke. He wore a green beret, with sine few tufts v of white hair poking out at the side. Around his neck he wore a shiny handkerchief with a lot of color. Under his jacket he wore a white crumpled shirt, with yellow edges around the neck. Apparently he does theater, doll theater and instruct people in the art of making theater puppets. The perfect hearthy personality I just need to catch on camera, while he's still around. After all what is a town withoutpeople?
Eventually we sauntered of to a store that specialize in ecological products. Expressive but tasty non the less. Visiting Kinsarvik was a fun experience, since he came for an ecological apple and left with twenty chocolate bars, witch had all conveniently expired. Still good though, especially at half price.
After a long and interesting conversation, we sat down at a hotel bar, with a very nice glass painting ceiling that kept changing color. There we talked about the logo design for his nordic themed album, from a small indie band known as Rafnborg. It's very melodic and makes for some interesting ambience. We even worked out a custom rune font. But thats it for now. Onwards to tacos.

Zaceron

Guitar progress?

Lesson learned, guitars are relatively easy to make, but the pay of will be so worth it. Weight reduction is going to be a real butt fungus to deal with, but eventually I will succeed. The really nightmarish part is to actually paint on the Union Jack flag. So far I’ve tried with painters tape, that idea has failed me hard, there is always something bleeding in under the tape, or wobbly lines. I considered painting it on transparent plastic. First thing that happened was that my minion spilled water over my many layers of paint. Which meant that I had to redo it again. Using foam was a at one point suggested. But small foam sheets are expensive as heck around here, or micro sized. So that is a no go. Paper on the other hand crumple up and becomes wonky when moisture is absorbed. Which leaves me to my final experiment this time around. Craft cardboard, primed with the right color. Cut into shape and attracted to a white sheet of paper. Which I will then glue on to the surface and apply a shiny finish, which might just makes it water retardant. It’s usually used for wood. 

#zaceron #unionjack #lordraptor #woodwoork #guitar #paintjob #darkstalkers